Throughout discussion, many people have said (or possibly thought) that Sylvie was a good guardian in the way that she allowed Ruth to be free and to develop into whoever she wanted to be, which, coincidentally, was basically who Sylvie was. But I don't think that this happened because that's what Ruth always wanted. Even though in the book it is shown that Lucille is that one that wants the structure and to follow the rules, I think that Ruth wants a bit of that too. As much as she developed without outside pressure on Sylvie's part, I think that she wanted a parental figure as much as Lucille did, and so she chose to copy Sylvie and become like her. She found structure in being able to emulate someone close to her, even if that wasn't consciously, Sylvie was a big part of Ruth's life and so obviously as a result she was a large influence. I am not saying this is a bad thing (even though I probably could not live like this) I am just saying that the reason Ruth and Sylvie are so alike is because Ruth wanted it to be that way. In her early childhood she didn't have an adult she could rely on, so as soon as she met Sylvie, I think she attached herself to her. However, her personality is differently different than Lucille's and I think that she probably would have had a kind of go with the flow attitude no matter what, I just think that it was brought to the extreme with Sylvie in her life.
On the other hand, I don't think that Lucille would have grown up to be as prissy and lonely or whatever as she is at the end the novel without the influence of Sylvie. She took it to the opposite extreme as Ruth did, and while she probably would have grown up to be one of those people that enjoyed order and rules, I think she would have been a bit more free spirited had she grown up in a conventional household. She might have even enjoyed breaking the rules and being a rebel once in a while, but I guess we'll never know. So anyway I think my point is that while Sylvie may have allowed Ruth and Lucille to be free and grow up mostly on their own, they were definitely shaped and affected by her presence.
This is a difficult dynamic to unpack, in large part because our view of young Ruth is indelibly shaped by older Ruth looking back and representing her younger self--so it sure looks like she and Sylvie are a natural fit, where this aunt shows up and cultivates tendencies that had already been fomenting in Ruth. But your reading, where Ruth is more strongly influenced by Sylvie (which would be a form of Sylvie "raising" her, shaping her into the woman she was to become), is also supported by the text--we could see Sylvie as a profound influence on Ruth's development, on the idea that existing in such a way is even possible, that trying to bend herself to conform to societal expectations isn't even desirable, let alone necessary.
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